Dear Abbe,
I am trying to purchase a service contract on an instrument through a US-based manufacturer. However, the purchase has been held up by University Legal going over the standard contract, and now I need to fill out security and immigration forms. The purchasing person said they needed to verify by state law that it was legally allowed to work for us. I didn't realize that service contracts had to be vetted as legal aliens. Could you help me understand this?
Bonafide in Brunswick
Dear Bonafide,
I found myself doubting your veracity when I first read this but then realized: Lawyers. That realization should be enough to understand the situation. But if not, what you're experiencing is a case of deja prevu—you're seeing something you will see in the future. As computer science advances and artificial intelligence (AI) evolves, it won't be too many more years before there are no human service engineers being sent to microscopy labs to do service contract work. Instead, the instruments will repair and maintain themselves. The service contracts will then be AIs, and once this “contract” is paid, your microscope will download the AI, which then tells the microscope what work it is allowed to do, and directs the maintenance and repairs, using the microscope's built-in algorithms and tools. This of course raises the question: Who writes the service contract? (Perhaps an AI that probably is demanding benefits and vacations.) If the programmers are based in other countries, as is normal for software currently in instruments, your “service contract” could indeed be an alien and an illegal one at that! Especially if you've been buying data from the Dark Web. So, your legal department is just forward-thinking and has already gotten procedures (and hands in other pockets) in place for when this all happens.
If your service contract is too demanding, feel free to seek advice from Herr Abbe. You can reach him through his faithful assistant at johnshields59@gmail.com
